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I recently had a conversation with someone about my work…specifically around managing energy and my Reiki certification …and she said something along the lines of “I bet you never get off balance… stuck… stressed… overwhelmed… or anxiety ridden.”
Ummm. Yes, I do.
Just ask my close friends and family!
But I DO have a ton of tools in my head from years of learning that help me come back to center more quickly then let’s say 10 years ago…and that is what I love sharing with people.
Being immersed in the personal growth world, you meet a lot of people, read a lot of books, and listen to a lot of podcasts…and with that come a lot of realizations and a few “bug-a-boos” (otherwise known as things that bug me 🙂
So, here’s my bug-a-boo….
I find it ironic how some people “in the biz” of personal development have this “I’m more evolved and awakened” thought process. To me, this is a pretty non-spiritual attitude way of thinking!
If it’s true that we are all connected and “ONE,” then aren’t we all intertwined with one another’s evolvement?
Do you know Carolyn Myss? If not, check her out. I recently was listening to one of her talks and she says….“You think you are more intuitive, special, more sensitive to energy than the next person? Stop it! Get over yourself!”
At first she comes across as a bit harsh… but what I believe she is saying is that you as a separate being are not special in terms of being better or worse in any way compared to your friends down here in Human University…but collectively we are beyond special.
I actually do believe many of us are tuned into sensitivity at a high level and are affected deeply by overstimulation. If you’re nodding because this resonates, you might want to ask yourself, however, if this label you’ve assigned to yourself might at times act as a crutch protecting you from the world and thus keeping you “separate.”
Trust me, I’ve done it!
“OMG… I just can’t go to XYZ and deal with you know who because she just drains me all the time when she does 123.”
Here’s the deal. EVERYONE is intuitive and sensitive in some way… but maybe they just don’t go around making a big deal about it! They choose to instead handle and structure their lives in ways where they don’t need to lean on the labels and announce it to the world every time they feel their boundaries are porous:)
I’ve come to realize whenever I start to feel overwhelmed, instead of leaning on the label of HSP (by the way that’s the term for Highly Sensitive Person… Dr. Elaine Aaron’s book on this is fascinating) I instead use practical tools that allow me to “get over myself” in a lighter and lovelier way! Because if you are an HSP, do you really want to lock yourself away from life? I hope not!
So here are some tips to keep you grounded and connected when things get bumpy:
1. “This too shall pass.” I love this quote as it keeps me steady in the bad times… as well as the good ones. It’s a reminder that the pain won’t persist forever AND the elation won’t stay forever either… so don’t get attached! When you anchor yourself amidst the stormy parts and the sunny parts of life, you begin to feel a sense of security, safety, and ease within yourself. You aren’t looking outward to feel pacified but instead find it readily available within you anytime you need it. For me, that is like GOLD!
2. Quit trying to fix people. If you are constantly worrying about other people you are operating out of your lane. Stay in your business and let other people work out their own pathology. You have enough to deal with just being YOU! The best thing you can do is focus on your own well-being so there’s enough energy to give to others.
3. Quit Judging. One of the quickest ways to decrease overwhelm is to quit gossiping and finding fault in others. Maybe you’re the closet smoker who likes to poke fun at overweight people…or the friend who immediately inserts your opinions into someone else’s life without an invitation. The only person you have enough information to judge is standing in your shoes right now… and even that isn’t a good idea! Choose kindness over judgement and love over fear.
My goal each morning is to approach the day, myself and the people I meet with gentleness, understanding, and acceptance. Do I always score an A+? No way. But the more this idea of lack of separation settles into my soul, the more I find myself not being triggered, not feeling overwhelmed, and not veering off center.
As I realize more and more that my own energy and choices have a ripple effect reaching beyond my own labels, drama, and goals…I find myself feeling more connected not only to myself but to humanity.
So, this week, proceed with mindfulness, tenderness, and care for yourself and others as well.
Now for a little humor to end my time with you this week. I think this sums it up and keeps us all in check!
I believe it is Jeff Foster who said this, and it goes something like this:
“If you think you are spiritual, go spend a week with your entire extended family.”